8 Things Every Woman Should Try In Bed

culled from:glamourmagazine.co.uk


1. Be selfish in bed
Have sex like a man. OK, that's not entirely fair. Have sex like that loser guy you slept with at uni who didn't care if you came or not. Put your pleasure first, ask for what you want and don't worry too much about whether he's having as good a time. We wouldn't make a habit of it, but we do think your man will like your selfish turn. "I've just got into a relationship with someone who is very vocal about what she wants," says our friend Max, 28. "A girl who knows what she wants is only half as sexy as a girl who has the guts to say it."

2. Lube it up
Who knew one small tube could revolutionise your sex life? Just a little bit of quality lube can mean the difference between discomfort and ecstasy. There are plenty of factors that can affect a woman's natural lubrication - dehydration, antihistamines, the Pill, stress, antidepressants, pregnancy and even breastfeeding; but you don't have to need it to enjoy it. Susi Lennox from Yes Lubricants says, "Adding a lubricant to your usual routine intensifies pleasure, enhances sensitivity, prolongs activity, helps prevent condoms from splitting and feels sensuous and stimulating." We're sold!

3. Wear something scandalous
"Some women prefer a sexy lingerie set with suspenders," says Sara Dappiano, buyer for luxury erotic boutique Coco de Mer. "If they're feeling really daring, we recommend a cupless bra and matching crotchless knickers!" Just make sure that what you're wearing is for both of you - feeling itchy and uncomfortable isn't going to make for memorable sex. If lingerie isn't your thing, try a pair of stilettos or red-hot lipstick, instead. It's like the sexual equivalent of a business suit, getting you in the right mindset.

4. Target your PS-spot
The G-spot is so 20th century! Introducing your PS-spot - the area directly opposite the G-spot, inside the vaginal canal. 'PS' stands for 'perineal sponge', a nerve-rich erectile tissue that swells during arousal and may appreciate a little manual stimulation. If your man can be a tad heavy-handed with your clitoris, this is the perfect alternative. One reader tells us, "My boyfriend stimulated my PS-spot with his fingers during oral sex; it was a seriously intense experience for both of us. He said I've never enjoyed a 'hand job' from him as much!"

5. Watch porn with a partner
Just as sex toys shouldn't have to be a solo activity, adult films can be a couples' thing, like watching Strictly together - only naked. "Porn can be a great sex toy when shared by two people," says Violet Blue, author of the Ultimate Guide To Adult Videos: How to Watch Adult Vidoes And Make Your Sex Life Sizzle. "Watching together can ignite hot conversations, or simply laughter at the ridiculousness of it all." Just take the time to find something you like.

6. Practice delayed gratification
It's easy for things to end up cosy rather than steamy with a long-term partner. Take yourself back to the early days by snogging like teenagers and then going out for the evening before having sex. Heidi, a 37-year-old nursery worker, is a fan: "We might make out in the evening upstairs while the kids are downstairs and after they've gone to bed we continue where we left off. The more we build it up, the more I look forward to having sex." Think of it as extended foreplay that no man could possibly complain about.

7. Dabble in domination and submission
No dungeon required, we promise. Instead of surprising your partner with a pair of handcuffs (though feel free if that's your thing!), start your adventure in domination and submission gently. Mistress Absolute (mistressabsolute.com), a professional dominatrix and author of the new instructional DVD Beginners Guide To BDSM, (that's bondage, discipline and sadomasochism) suggests "having a 'Princess Day', where your partner agrees to pamper you and do as you say all day - within agreed boundaries. Include anything from foot rubs to a little light bondage". If your fella isn't sure about it, tell him that next time he gets to be the boss.

8. Stop chasing the orgasm
Andrew and Emily love to give each other pleasure - as a young, married couple, they feel it's their duty. "But when it's not happening for one of us, the orgasm pressure starts to mount," says Andrew. "Emily tends to feel awful if I don't orgasm, and when she chases her own, the resulting orgasm tends to be a bit soulless - more a relief than a joy. "Where's the fun in that? Let this tale be a cautionary one. Sometimes it's best to be less goal-orientated about sex. Instead of obsessing about the destination, sit back, relax and enjoy the ride.
Six things NOT to do in bed (ever)
1. Criticise
Nothing can deflate the moment (ahem) like a sexual put-down. If he's doing something you don't like, try saying, "I'd love it if you..."

2. Talk about your work, ex, or mother in bed
Sounds obvious, but it's so easy to start downloading the minute you get into bed. Sex is escapism, so pillow talk should avoid the mundane or touchy.

3. Fake orgasm
You'll have to keep up the ruse and he'll never learn what works for you.

4. Be wishy-washy
When your partner whispers, "How do you want it?" don't say, "I don't mind, whatever." Know what you do and don't want.

5. Try to keep up with the Joneses
It's great to get tips from your friends, but don't let it make you feel bad about your sex life.

6. Get 'Ready' for sex
Sure, it's nice to clean your teeth and shower before sex but sometimes - just go with the flow - hairy legs and all!