How to Manage People Who Are Older Than You

culled from:themuse.com

1. Be an Effective Communicator

Being a great communicator means knowing when to listen and when to share. In the early conversations I had with my team members, my mind would speed ahead to the points I felt I needed to make to reiterate that I was capable. After a while, I realized that everyone on all sides felt their ideas and opinions were being dismissed. It took a conscious effort to quiet the voice in my head that wanted to prove itself, but doing so was worth the effort because it enabled me to really hear what they were saying and to process it. If your colleagues feel valued, respected, and heard, they’ll notice your maturity, not your age.

2. Value Your Staff

Older doesn’t always mean wiser, but what it does usually mean is more experienced. A great manager knows how to leverage his or her team’s strengths, and that’s why it’s critical that you take the time to get to know your staff as individuals. Identify their unique talents and strengths, and look for ways to incorporate their opinions and honor their gifts. You will shine brighter as a leader when each individual member of your team is given the encouragement and tools to shine themselves.

3. Focus on Results, not the Process

Each person has a different set of needs that must be met in order to thrive. It’s more important than ever that you pay attention to the needs of your staff and avoid judging them. I once had an employee who required loud music in order to concentrate. I couldn’t understand such a process, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt—he got my large office so that he could work in loud solitude, and I moved into a smaller space with other members of my team. In the end, his work was stellar, so why not?
Surrender your ego, and put the team’s ability to succeed first.

4. Be Prepared to Answer the Age Question

The good news is that it’s illegal for someone to ask your age in the workplace. The bad news is that people ask it anyway. With that in mind, give some serious consideration to how you want to answer the inevitable question so you don’t get caught off guard. If your team sees you looking like a deer in headlights, you’ll solidify their suspicion that you just can’t handle the big job that awaits you.
If you don’t want to disclose your age but also don’t want to be unpleasant about it, just smile and playfully say something like “old enough to do the job.” If you are comfortable with sharing, go ahead! However you choose to handle it, be prepared for the question, answer it with confidence, and move on. The point is to avoid letting it become a subject for continued speculation. In order to do this, have an authentic response that’s well thought out before the age question presents itself so that you’re in a better position to control the conversation.

5. Become a Source of Stillness

Studies show that being stressed in the workplace leads to concentration problems, disorganization, and even anger. All too often, the mood in the office is dictated by the manager’s temperament. A friend of mine once had a young manager who was extremely capable, but she was easily overwhelmed and would often allow her frustration to spill over onto the rest of the team. While there are managers of all ages who share this trait, her youth and inexperience bore the brunt of the blame, and her staff started looking for de facto leadership elsewhere in the company.
Bottom line? If you are chaotic and unsure of yourself, your staff will pick up on it. If you can be a source of stillness, calm, and reason for your team, your age won’t matter.

6. Seek Respect, Not Approval

Machiavelli said he would rather be feared than loved. While I believe there was some wisdom in The Prince, I don’t advocate instilling fear in your employees. However, I believe there is a significant difference between respect and love, and when it comes to employees’ treatment of the boss, a healthy amount of the former is always best.
Getting that respect from them depends on you. Leave your social self—the one who seeks approval and needs to be liked—at home. The office is not the time or place for you to find your new best friend or workout partner.
For example, if an employee arrives 10 minutes late to a meeting, apologizing profusely, and you simply say, “no problem,” the other employees will notice. These shifts are often imperceptible in the moment, but over time, seeking the approval or acceptance of your staff gives the impression that you are a pushover, or worse, that you are scared of offending them. If you are driven by the need to be liked, your employees will inevitably start to wonder who is actually in charge.