How to Speak so Everyone Listens

culled from:wobi.com


The most important thing to know about communication is that not everyone likes to give and get information in the same way:

‒        Everyone has different emotional needs.

‒        Everyone is in a different emotional state.

‒        Everyone has different communication styles and preferences.

‒        Everyone hears information differently.

‒        Cultural, educational and economic diversity increase these differences.

If we want to speak so everyone listens, we must undo our own communication biases, know how to identify what type of communication our audience wants, and learn to adjust our communication style accordingly and in the moment so our message is heard and understood.

To simplify the process, I’ve distilled it down to the following four major personality types, Intuitive, Functional, Analytical and Personal. Each personality type has its own preferred style of communication.

Intuitive personalitieswant unemotional communications that are short and to the point. You’ll get and hold these folks’ attention if you don’t waste their time. Start with the bottom line of your message. Then, once you’ve got their trust and buy in, go ahead and present your other important points.

Functional personalitieslike to feel in control and respond best to linear communications that start at point A, and then cover B, C---all the way to Z. (Note that this type of linear communication is the opposite of what Intuitives prefer.) Your message will best be heard and understood by delivering process-oriented details that flow from start to finish.

Analytical personalitiesare data-focused people whose trust is earned by confident communications that convey expertise. Give Analyticals the hard facts and numbers; the more specific you make your message, the more successfully you’ll allay their suspicions and win their buy in.

Personal personalitieswant emotional and freeform communications that establish an interpersonal relationship. Use lots of emotional language delivered in an informal and friendly way that lets these folks know who else will be involved and how what you’re asking them to do will make them feel.

Start by Diagnosing Yourself

Before we can effectively deliver our message, we must first understand our own preferred style of communication. This allows us to undo our communication biases and tailor our message so others can hear our words and understand what we want them to do. Our online assessment: http://www.leadershipiq.com/LeadershipIQ-Communication.pdf. will help you identify whether you’re an Intuitive, Analytical, Functional or Personal communicator.

Next we must consider our audience to learn who we are talking to and how best to adjust our message so we can reach them. You’re not going to deliver the same message in different ways, but rather present different kinds of information to each of the four types. If it’s possible, for example, with an employee or peer, have the person take the communication-style assessment. If that’s not feasible, tryasking “What can I share with you today? What would you like to know?” Then listen to and observe their response. Are their words and manner rushed (they may be Intuitive), cold and aloof (they may be Analytical), warm and relaxed (they may be Personal), or something else?  Also be aware of verbal indicators. For example, Analyticals may respond: “I want to know where this data is coming from?” Intutives with: “Where does this get us?”  Functionals with: “What happens first?” and Personals with: “Who else will be involved?”

If you’re not sure what communication styles(s) are present, or you’re walking into a situation cold or where the audience is too big to easily question, multi path your messageto hit each style in order of attention span. Start with Intuitives (bottom line) who have the shortest attention spans. Next address Analyticals (data), then Functionals (A to Z), and then deliver a warm and fuzzy ending for the Personals who have the longest attention spans.

Preferred communication styles are not personality types, but rather the way people like to give and get information. People’s preferred communications styles can change so always pay attention to your audience. When you know who you’re talking to and what they want to hear, you can deliver a message that everyone listens to.