Proper Airplane Etiquette

Proper In-Flight Etiquette

Unlike decades ago, when air travel was considered a luxury, today’s in-flight experience is more like a trip to the DMV, or having your teeth pulled without Novocain, or the tragic news that Snooki is now being paid to speak at college graduations (REALLY?!?!).  However, all the bad manners of in-flight travel can quickly be resolved with a little patience and a lot of good will.

So with that, you are all safe to move about the cabin and check out my top 3 Quick and Dirty Tips for proper in-flight travel:

Tip #1 – It’s a Seat, Not a Bed

My wife will be the first one to tell you that I fall asleep on planes – even before take off. She’ll probably also tell you that I snore. Guilty. However, whether you snore, twitch, or sing show tunes in your sleep, your seat is not a bed – and neither is the seat next to you.  And don’t get me started on the rules of the armrest. How many times have you had to sit next to someone, see them falling asleep, and next thing you know, they’re planted face down on your tray?

I’m not saying that you can’t sleep on a plane. But if you are going to nap, the proper way to catch some Zs is to remain in your area. Don’t lounge over anyone else. Don’t hog the armrest like a football and don’t rest your head on a stranger’s shoulder. I’ve seen this countless times and it’s just awful. If you know for sure you are going to fall asleep ahead of time, try to get a seat by the window. This way, you have something to lean against that’s not going to resent you. If you are unfortunate enough to have someone else designate you as their new pillow, the proper thing to do is to wake them and let them know they are in your space. There is nothing wrong or unmannerly about doing this. Don’t rattle, shake, or otherwise manhandle them – just kindly tap them and ask them to please remain in their area.

Tip #2 – Kids Will be Kids, But There is a Limit

This past weekend, on my flight back, I traveled with my brother and his two-year-old daughter. So, between the two of us we had two very active toddlers who enjoy nothing more than NOT sleeping on a plane.  In addition, there was an infant 3 rows behind me. I’m 100% positive that when the rest of the travelers saw me, my brother, and the guy behind me coming onto the plane with all of our kids, they prayed not to have to sit by us.  Do I blame them? Not really. I’m not so blind as to think that kids aren’t tough to handle on planes. Regardless of how cute and cuddly they are, nothing can disturb you more than a toy being tossed at your face from across the row or, my favorite, having a child play soccer with the back of your seat.

For starters, you have to realize that kids do not understand – or fully grasp - proper etiquette when it comes to flying.  So you must help them out. There are two parts to this issue:

    For the parent of a child – Consider your fellow travelers and bring as much as you can to occupy your child. We packed an entire carry-on bag of snacks, games, toys, books, and crayons to keep my daughter busy. Yes, she still got bored, but if you offer plenty of choices, it will help to keep the kids occupied.

    For the passenger next to a rowdy child – Firstly, understand that a parent would love to keep their child quiet and are trying to. However, if you witness a parent who is completely ignoring the fact that their kid is bouncing off the walls and causing a noisy racket, feel free to let them know, in a friendly way. I advise to try and keep a smile when doing so. This may take a few tries, but eventually, they will listen.

Tip #3 – Realize That Air Travel is Not Glamorous

Unless you’re Sir Richard Branson or P Diddy (or is it Puffy now?) and can fly on your own private jet, you’ll likely encounter the gambit of foul manners, foul odors, and foul food en route to your destination. It’s a nightmare. The seats are too small, the air is stale, and everyone wants to get off as soon as possible. Knowing this, and realizing that you are not in the lap of luxury, could be the easiest way to get through your flight.

It’s like handling an awkward dinner date that you wished never happened: just relax, stay focused, and try to make the best of the situation.  They say that high expectations are the quickest way to disappointment, and air travel is a great example of this.  Don’t expect a gourmet meal - realize you will get a 100 calorie pack of chips, a Dixie cup sized, water-downed soda, and (if you’re lucky) a napkin the size of business card. Don’t expect the person sitting next to you to smell like roses - chances are they will reek of cigarettes and one too many drinks. Also, don’t expect others to grasp manners the way you do. As a dedicated reader, you know more than anyone that poor etiquette in public settings happens everywhere. So, when you find yourself about to rip your hair out because the person next to you will not stop talking, sit back, put your headphones on and just think about the soft landing to come soon.

source:.quickanddirtytips.com