Why You Should Open Up and be More Authentic

culled from:grassrootssucess.net

I’ve learned a really important lesson since I’ve started on this journey of trying to help people with my writing – that being authentic and being real are far more powerful than pretending to be something you aren’t. My Facebook feeds are full of people trying to impress everyone else, be it with pictures of their 8 pack abs, the food they are eating, that they are #blessed (get me a bucket). The problem is, it all screams fake, it screams attention seeking. I used to be like that – I always wanted everyone to think I was successful, that I was killing it in life and that they should aspire to be like me.

Then something happened. They say that pride goeth before the fall, and that was certainly true in my case. I had a large fall from grace in my career a couple of years ago, which left me feeling utterly humiliated and not wanting to talk to anyone for fear of being asked what was happening and being embarrassed. It was a very difficult time and I had moments where I wondered if it would ever pass. Fast forward to today and I am a very different person. I’ve discovered that the greatest gift you can give yourself and other people is to be more authentic and to be real. See, I really hate it when people that find success in something act as though it’s no big deal. Whether it’s a celebrity saying she got back to her pre-baby weight in a couple of weeks with no help, or someone who has made a boatload of money acting as though it was all pretty easy.

I hate it because it’s bullshit. Life is tough, and when you’re trying to achieve things, it’s even tougher. I started opening up and sharing my struggles when I started writing on this site because holding them in and trying to act as though it’s all easy is exhausting and disingenuous. I hate tall poppy syndrome, but you can’t blame people for hating your success when you act as though it all came easily. Everyone else around you has their own struggles, so when they see you doing so much better without any effort, it pisses them off. They wonder why the hell you should be so lucky.

This is why I made a vow to myself a few months back, knowing that in the next couple of years my successes are going to start gathering steam. I made a vow that I would never lie about what it took to get there, I’d never lie about how hard it was and what I went through in the sense of emotion and time invested. The most important reason for doing this is because when you are real and authentic with other people, you give them permission to be real and authentic with you and other people. People in the Western world are so obsessed with looking good in the eyes of other people, with looking as though everything is easy and that they are so much better. When I began to open up about my struggles, I found people incredibly receptive and willing to be real themselves.

One of my strongest beliefs is that we as a society need to move beyond competing with each other and move towards co-operating and caring for each other more. This starts with opening up and being real with the people around you. Stop trying to impress everyone around you, especially those in your inner circle. They most of all should know  your struggles, and you should know theirs. You should be supporting each other through the ups and downs, because those are the relationships that make life worth living. You can’t have those if you just want to impress all the time.