Friday 27 February 2015


1. When your friends suggest "sharing a bunch of things" at dinner.
Nope. That's a terrible idea. One of two things is about to happen: (1) I can only eat one or two of the things we order, will end up hunrgy and grumpy, and will become even more bitter when some suggests we evenly split the check; or (2) You guys are going to be nice and suggest that we pick only gluten-free items, and then I'm going to feel really guilty as you longing look at other tables' far more appealing gluten-packed meals.
2. When, in front of a big group, someone asks you what happens when you eat gluten.
This is about to get awkward. Do you really want to know the gory details of my digestive woes? You're going to be sorry you asked.
3. When you ask the waiter for the 10th time to confirm that your dish is, in fact, gluten-free.
God I sound annoying. He's probably so annoyed. I'm even annoying myself.
4. When you're grocery shopping.
Reading food labels is a must when you have a gluten sensitivity.
Photo by Nancy R. Cohen/Getty Images
Must. Read. Every. Single. Ingredient. No "malt flavoring" is getting past this girl.
5. When someone apologizes for enjoying something with gluten in front of you.
Jeez, do I look that upset? Just because I can't eat that cookie (or pizza, or cronut) doesn't mean I don't want you to enjoy it!
6. When you ask the waiter what desserts are gluten-free and she suggests a bowl of fruit.
[Single tear rolls down cheek]
7. When someone says, "Oh, that's probably gluten-free. Just get it."
I really wish I could. But being sick for the next week just isn't worth winging it. So I'm going to have to triple check everything. (See #2)
8. When you tell someone you can't eat gluten and they give you a concerned look and say, "Oh no, do you have Celiac disease?"
It's awesome that Celiac disease is finally widely recognized. But it's not the only medical reason people need to eat a gluten-free diet. But if I answer this question with a "no," people assume that I'm trying to lose weight or am looking for attention or a Miley Cyrus fan. Or all three.
9. When someone brings a gluten-free dish to a party just for you.
I'm so grateful that I'm going to stuff myself to the point of bursting just to show how much I appreciate it.
10. When someone dips a big hunk of bread into that dish of hummus.


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