My Top 7 Tips To Overcome Your Fear Of Public Speaking

culled from:entrepreneurs-journey.com

1. It Doesn’t Really Matter What Happens

This is a guiding principle for anything I feel afraid about doing or worry about not succeeding at. Whether it’s presenting on stage, launching a product, going up to talk to a girl at a party, or even having what society tells you is a “successful” life.
Your concerns about performance arise from your ego’s desire for recognition, the fear of failure and of what people will think of you. Drop the ego and accept that you can never control what other people think. All that is left is what really matters – the performance itself. Stay focused on doing the best job you can given your current situation.
Reducing your attachment to outcomes is a helpful reframe. I find it makes anything I am about to do feel less important, thus less anxiety ridden. What matters is having the experience.
However it is necessary to marry this concept with a healthy dose of desire.
There’s nothing wrong with needing or wanting something – you should feel this in order to motivate you to get better or to strive for something. Just remember in the end it doesn’t have any more meaning than you give it.
This tip is dipping into more personal development subject matters, which obviously are relevant if you want to improve an aspect of your life like public speaking. If you are interested in a deeper looking at my philosophy on how to create positive change in your life, start here (and read all 9 chapters if you are really keen!).

2. Know Your Topic And Tell Stories

It helps if you know the topic you are about to talk about, but it goes beyond mere knowledge, you need to really care about it.
If you love what you are talking about so much that you could just blabber on without the need for props or palm cards or slides or anything, it’s much easier to sound natural and enthusiastic when you present. Subjects that are your passions are fun to talk about (that’s why so many people are great when it comes to talking about themselves!).
Use storytelling and case studies to demonstrate your passion. This will make public speaking a breeze, once you get past the primal fear of exposure to people in public, which you can do with help from immersion therapy, coming up next…

3. Gradually Increase Your Exposure (Immersion Therapy)

It really helps if you can build your capabilities up with small doses of public speaking.
You might start by desensitizing yourself to that experience of everyone listening to you by asking a question next time you are in a group situation, or at a workshop. This is great because you only have to say a sentence or two, but you are the center of attention during that time. It’s daunting for shy people, but a great first step towards longer periods of immersion.
Other things you might try to build up your tenacity –

• Talk to strangers on the street, or when catching the bus or train.
• Attempt to stimulate an engaging conversation with people who are paid to talk to you, like retail shop assistants, rather than just brushing them off (it’s conversation practice without needing to make the opener).
• Give yourself a goal at every networking event that challenges you, like opening up a large circle of people
• Do things that people consider socially awkward. Any time you feel that socially uncomfortable feeling you know that’s the time to keep doing it to desensitize yourself. You are only feeling uncomfortable because you are conditioned to do so, and conditioning can be changed.
• Smile and make eye contact with strangers every day.
• Ask questions every time you get a chance to do so when attending an event with a speaker. Go up to the speaker afterwards and engage them in conversation.
• Get yourself invited to a panel discussion, or do a short talk to a small group, or be a guest on a podcast interview.

And on and on and on… You must continue to immerse yourself in these public exposure experiences until you no longer feel uncomfortable about it. It’s all about baby steps.

4. Practice At Home By Yourself

The very first few episodes of my podcast where just me talking off the top of my head into a microphone. This helped me get comfortable speaking publicly because I knew the audio would be distributed to people all over the world, and helped me to develop the ability to “riff” without any notes or slides.
Even if you don’t have a podcast you can practice creating an audio file by recording your voice into your computer. Just don’t be too hard on yourself when you listen to the playback, nobody likes the sound of their own voice.

5. Start A YouTube Channel

It might not be live, but creating video is very similar to presenting on stage (and trust me, you can be just as nervous before creating a video even if you are by yourself). You get the chance to “retake” your mistakes, but the sense that everybody is listening to you is still there – and the pressure to perform too!

6. Take A Public Speaking Course

This is not something I have done, but I did do drama classes in high school (I still can’t believe I did this!), which was a great way to force myself to act in public situations.
The commitment when you sign up for something that you know will put you in situations that are uncomfortable is powerful. It’s like a promise you make to yourself, which means you will feel pretty bad if you don’t.
I hate regret more than anything. I’d rather fail or make a fool of myself rather than not do something I know I want to do. Taking a course or some kind of commitment that forces you to practice is a great idea.

7. Present With Friends

I find talking with a friend, or doing an interview, or any environment where it’s not just you, a much more comfortable set-up for public speaking.
You might do a webinar or podcast with a partner, or conduct live workshops with a friend, or just get yourself invited to participate in a question and answer session as a guest expert. Whatever the case, as a first taste of public teaching, doing it with another person makes it much easier.
It also makes you feel more accountable to work with a friend because you don’t want to disappoint them. This leads to better preparation, more focus and generally a better result.