Monday 30 March 2015



You get hopeful, plan not to make the mistakes that you made in the past and enjoy and do what you think will make it work this time around.
It’s the same with love and new relationships, one phase is cleared away as fresh emotions, feelings and desires take over.
You must realise that a good start is very important for the destination of your new relationship — you don’t want to create a wrong impression or even chase away the catch.
So, here are 7 DON'Ts you should observe when you find love anew:
  1. Don’t lose your head. The fact that you fell out of one relationship doesn’t mean you are so worthless that the next person that comes calling becomes your god. So you should avoid texting/calling every second, visiting every minute or just giving excessive attention. It reeks of desperation and you may be choking your new found love.
  2. Don’t pretend. Some people also try to become what they are not when they meet someone new. The idea is that they want to be the ‘good/ideal’ man/woman so as to be loved. Unfortunately, the real ‘you’ always comes through at some point. If it does, you are most certain to love your love because the new characteristics won’t fit in.
  3. Don’t compare your new lover to previous ones. Even identical twins have different thoughts and traits so don’t judge your lover based on your ex and don’t expect to get the same things you used to get. In fact, erase your ex and try as much as possible not to talk about what you did and did not do in your past romances. For your own sake, don’t ask too much questions about his/her past lovers. What will you gain?
  4. Don’t rush, take it slow and steady. There’s time to love and know each other, so don’t try to move the relationship too fast. Don’t start forcing wedding talks, children talk, moving in together talks when you’re yet to know each other. Also give some time for former lovers to be properly ejected. You should not expect a total clean-up in one day of your romance. You need to allow for time for you both to explore and understand each other.
  5. Don’t put yourself in the spotlight. Love is about ‘us’ not ‘me’ so try to not make yourself the centre of it all. You should not be the chatterbox that has a lot to say about himself/herself and doesn’t give room to the other’s talk. It’s not about you alone; it’s about both of you. So listen and show interest in his/her activities, dreams etc. and make it a collective romance.
  6. Don’t be a CIA agent. Some people want to know everything about their new lover in one day, so they snoop around — read private documents, read SMSs, ask personal questions from friends and colleagues, stalk on social media. Some will also ask questions every minute like it’s a Gestapo interview. Wrong! Learn about him/her in bits — by spending time together and talking, and don’t go snoopy about it.
  7. Don’t look for perfection. If you think a new relationship will offer you a flawless angel, look again. Expect the new person to have his/her flaws which you must put up with, after all you have yours. Sometimes, focusing on the defect of your new love may kill your zeal. Instead, glorify the positives about him/her and watch your admiration grow.


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