Monday 2 March 2015

Happy lady





culled from:pulse.ng


In romantic relationships, we can all be a little clingy once in a while.
This need to be together all the time, to constantly seek attention and love, arises from a sense of insecurity — in oneself, in one's ability to hold on to a partner, in the viability of the relationship itself.
However, there are some people out there — men and women— who are naturally independent and who bring that quality to bear on their love lives.
They could teach the rest of us a few lessons about how to maintain one's individuality even in the closest relationships.
  1. They spend time alone: Some people love having time to themselves — for many, in fact, it's an absolute necessity. They like having time alone at home, going to movies by themselves, and eating solo at restaurants. This desire for solitude doesn't go away when they get into relationships; instead, they learn to balance the time they spend with their partners with much-valued time apart. This time away from each other can be a powerful component to keeping the relationship fresh, and keeping the couple from burning out on each other.
  2. They spend time with other people: Independent people maintain separate social lives from those of their partners: They have their own friends and attend their own social events, in addition to sharing some of those things with one another. Maintaining an independent social life is good for any romantic relationship because it's simply too much to expect your romantic partner to fulfill all of your social needs. If you get to have fun hanging out with friends, you'll put less pressure on your partner to be your end-all, be-all companion.
  3. They don't 'check in' constantly: Some couples like checking in with each other many times throughout the day — through email, texts, and lunch-hour phone calls. But for independent people, this kind of constant exchange feels unnecessary and irritating. They're ok with letting a day or two pass without talking to their partners; the break means that they're not struggling to create small talk with someone all the time, and when they do connect with their partners again, they have fun new things to talk about.
  4. They let their partners do their own thing: Independent people understand that just as they need time away from their partners, their partners also need to have their own separate identities. This approach can help the overall health of a relationship by allowing both people to maintain clear senses of self. Being able to comfortably spend time apart is also an indication that you and your partner are secure in the relationship — neither of you is constantly bogged down with worrying about what the other person is doing, thinking, or feeling.
  5. They stand up for themselves: An independent person has a very strong sense of who they are, and, therefore, a clear idea of what they want. When you really know yourself, you feel comfortable speaking up about what your desires and limits are.
  6. They don't rush to move in together: For some people, being in love means moving in together as quickly as possible, while others are happy to maintain their separate living spaces for a long time. Having their own spaces means that they can continue to have valuable alone time (see #1) and that they can maintain their own domestic routines. When independent people do finally move in with their partners, they do so after a lot of thoughtful consideration and discussion of how their cohabitation is going to work, giving the endeavor a firm basis for success.
  7. They travel alone: Traveling as a couple can be stressful, and some people just like traveling alone. If you're in a couple made up of two independent people, you'll appreciate getting to travel by yourself. It will give you a chance to recharge, you and your partner an opportunity to miss each other, and lots to talk about when you get back.

6 comments:

  1. This is more like having a distance relationship,to me it is good and it wil groom the persons involved to be cautious.OKE MARIAM OLUWASEUN

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  2. This is amazing if it could be practised.AKINYEMI MODUPE ESTHER

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  3. Sure a breathing space is needed.OKANLAWON OMOBOLA HABEEB

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  4. IN EVERY RELATIONSHIP, UNDERSTANDING FROM BOTH PARTNERS SHOULD BE TH BEDROCK. AKANGBE OKIKI-JESU CHRISTIANAH

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  5. Distance is a test of love

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  6. relationship is all about understanding

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